Rockstar Parody

♫ I'm through with hot body contests at clubs.
I'm like the bottom of the barrel
and I'm never gonna win.
This bella vita hasn't turned out
Quite the way I want it to be.
(Tell me what you want)

I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs
And a bedroom I can prostitute in.
And a king size tub.
Big enough for ten plus me.
(Yeah, so what you need?)

I need a stolen credit card that's got no limit
And a big getaway jet with a bedroom in it.
Gonna join the mile high club
While drinking Corona at thirty-seven thousand feet.
(Been there, done that)

I want a new tour bus instead of that death stench car.
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard.
Somewhere between Brad Pitt
And Johnny Depp is fine for me. Mmmm hmmm.
(So how you gonna do it?)

I'm gonna kill my kid
For fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair
And change my name.

'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin' fifteen cars.
The johns come easy and the drugs come cheap.
I won't stay skinny 'cause all I'll do is eat.

And I'll hang out in dive bars,
In the VIP with washed up reality stars.
Every bad baby killer's gonna wind up there.
Every drunk former mom with ever changing hair.

And well, hey, hey, I wanna be a cockstar.
Hey, hey, I mean, I wanna be a rockstar.

I wanna be great like Heidi Fleiss without the hassles.
Hire eight body guards that love to stick it up my asshole.
Convert to Christianity
So I can eat my meals for free.
(I'll have Velveeta, ha, ha)

I'm gonna dress my ass with the latest Target fashion.
Get a front door key to an imaginary boyfriend's mansion.
Gonna date a former felon that loves
to leak video diaries for me.

I'm gonna kill my kid
For fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair
And change my name.

'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin' fifteen cars.
The johns come easy and the drugs come cheap.
I won't stay skinny 'cause all I'll do is eat.

And I'll hang out in dive bars,
In the VIP with washed up reality stars.
Every bad baby killer's gonna wind up there.
Every drunk former mom with ever changing hair.

And I'll hide out at a Pastor's house
With a brand new computer and a fridge full of food.
The congregation will pay for everything
thanks to my evil smile.
All the while, I'll have a drug dealer on speed dial.

Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a cockstar, um yeah, I mean, I wanna be a rockstar.

Gonna do interviews that offend the haters.
Gonna pop my morning-after pills from a Pez dispenser.
Get Casey Anthony's Conscience to write all my songs,
Lip-synch 'em every night while masturbating with a dong.

'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin' fifteen cars.
The johns come easy and the drugs come cheap.
I won't stay skinny 'cause all I'll do is eat.

And I'll hang out in dive bars,
In the VIP with washed up reality stars.
Every bad baby killer's gonna wind up there.
Every drunk former mom with ever changing hair.

And I'll hide out at a Pastor's house
With a brand new computer and a fridge full of food.
The congregation will pay for everything
thanks to my evil smile.
All the while, I'll have a drug dealer on speed dial.

Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar.
Hey, hey, no, I wanna be a cockstar. ♫